All that, and he just wanted some quiet. There are three main reasons why I am so misanthropic and apathetic towards the holiday season.
It's the least wonderful time of the year.
I keep hearing about how the Christmas season brings the best out of people, but there are two points that I want to bring up. First, as my nigga Miguel just wrote about, and I am sure you heard on the news concerning the Black Friday debacle that resulted in several injuries including a trampled pregnant woman, and a guy was trampled to fucking DEATH. You motherfuckers just want to get presents, you don't give a shit about the true meaning of Christmas. Fuck you.
Point number two is a personal question; "why are you waiting an entire year to act like a fucking human being?". Even when you can't be bothered to do so, why are you such cunts that you have to make me look like I pray for the burning of babies every day just because I don't partake in your pagan hallmark holiday? I don't mind that you celebrate, but don't try to ostracize me for you being a greedy, selfish twat on every day but the 25th.
Uh… it’s not Jesus’ birthday
Yeah, you should read a book or two. Not his birthday. Don't believe me? When did the Romans celebrate the Winter Solstice? Or ANYONE ELSE? Give up? It's okay. I'll just tell you. You must be tired from the Christmas shopping. It's December 25th. Yeah, we are celebrating on that day because... well, because everyone else is, too. So fuck yourself with a ladle.
Too much work
...and people keep ruining it. How many movies are there that are just about ruined holidays? Normally it's the people who are the most dead-set on the holiday that fuck them up for everyone. The last Thanksgiving and Christmas that I celebrated? Ruined by the same fucker who berated me for not wanting to go. Who the fuck wants to spend all that time doing shit that you could just do any other day of the year without the work? Bollocks, I say.
-jack
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