Being a vegetarian in an omnivorous society is tough. Trying to be one sucks fat nuts.

I have tried in the past several times, for one reason or another- it never stuck because I never did it for myself- that was the problem. Recently, I decided that it would be better for me, and I feel great by comparison. Unlike many others, I didn't just drop off the edge of the meat-eating planet, I transition foods out of my diet. First that had to go was drive thru beef, so I had a "Last Supper" for In-and-Out. Two double doubles and animal fries. I was sick for a fucking week, and it was goddamned worth it. FUCK, it was delicious. Next was pork, which was a surprise as to how painful it would be to let it go. Sausages, hot dogs, bacon- sweet JAYSUS, letting bacon go was worse than losing a first born child. I would rather spike a baby than have to go through that again.

Excluding red meat from my diet did a real number on me. Including but not limited to:

Granting a more acute and developed sense of taste.
Average American makes their meals with the majority of the focus on the meat; the vegetables and sides are afterthoughts. Consider for a moment what it means if the main focus of the meal is the vegetables. While cooking, one would have to take serious consideration in the preparation of their food. Spices aren't just window dressing- they make and break a meal.

A significant decrease in muscle mass.
I saw this one coming, it just happened way faster than I thought. I dropped about twenty pounds in a month, and with the fat, a lot of muscle went as well. Partially because I changed my workout habits, and stopped power lifting, partially because I was a bit B12 deficient. That, and I wasn't making up all of the animal proteins that I was losing with the cow and buffalo. In fact, I wasn't replacing them with green leafies, either. In short, I got lazy, which is a murderer of young vegetarians. I started supplementing properly again and I upped the fish proteins and veggie intake. I'm still much weaker than I was before, but after some serious consideration, I realized how little I needed THAT MUCH MUSCLE. It's fun to have, but there are very few practical applications in my day to day life.

I became intolerant to poor ingredients and preparation.
I'll get into in a minute, but if the food sucks, I gag. I can't eat poorly made food. This means that I only have maybe three friends who can cook for me, and if I am too tired or lazy to cook a proper meal, I just go without (such a bad idea). There is also a shrinking list of restaurants that I can go to eat. Wanna see? Of course you do.


Here is a list of my favorite fast food places
In-and-Out
Carl's Jr
Taco Bell
Del Taco
Jack in the Box
KFC
Wendy's
Long John Silver's
Samurai Sam's
Kyoto Bowl
Panda Express

List of fast food places that I can still go to.
Samurai Sam's
Kyoto Bowl

...fuck. Note that Burger King and McDonald's aren't on there. I haven't been able to eat from there in years.

Getting a quick meal isn't as easy as it used to be. No worries, I don't feel as if my colon is a septic tank anymore. I mean, if I have a hamburger now, I'll miss two days of work, and if I find myself back on the east coast and within a day's drive of White Castle, I don't care if I would spend a week in the ICU, I am down with a 10 sack with two extra orders of chicken rings. MUST. HAVE. IN. BELLY.

Next time, I'll go over a few recipes.

-jack

Holidays and Why I Hate Them

“You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch. You really are a heel. You're as cuddly as a cactus, You're as charming as an eel...”

All that, and he just wanted some quiet. There are three main reasons why I am so misanthropic and apathetic towards the holiday season.

It's the least wonderful time of the year.
I keep hearing about how the Christmas season brings the best out of people, but there are two points that I want to bring up. First, as my nigga Miguel just wrote about, and I am sure you heard on the news concerning the Black Friday debacle that resulted in several injuries including a trampled pregnant woman, and a guy was trampled to fucking DEATH. You motherfuckers just want to get presents, you don't give a shit about the true meaning of Christmas. Fuck you.
Point number two is a personal question; "why are you waiting an entire year to act like a fucking human being?". Even when you can't be bothered to do so, why are you such cunts that you have to make me look like I pray for the burning of babies every day just because I don't partake in your pagan hallmark holiday? I don't mind that you celebrate, but don't try to ostracize me for you being a greedy, selfish twat on every day but the 25th.

Uh… it’s not Jesus’ birthday
Yeah, you should read a book or two. Not his birthday. Don't believe me? When did the Romans celebrate the Winter Solstice? Or ANYONE ELSE? Give up? It's okay. I'll just tell you. You must be tired from the Christmas shopping. It's December 25th. Yeah, we are celebrating on that day because... well, because everyone else is, too. So fuck yourself with a ladle.

Too much work
...and people keep ruining it. How many movies are there that are just about ruined holidays? Normally it's the people who are the most dead-set on the holiday that fuck them up for everyone. The last Thanksgiving and Christmas that I celebrated? Ruined by the same fucker who berated me for not wanting to go. Who the fuck wants to spend all that time doing shit that you could just do any other day of the year without the work? Bollocks, I say.

-jack